Hi again …
Today 15th of March 2017 an article that I said to myself I had to write.
Because I am explaining you if you read the following lines …
Today is the National day for the “eating disorders”. Lilac ribbon.
What does this mean?
It means that there are still too many people on this planet that are suffering for eating disorders.
Fashion has a big responsibility in this. Because the idea, the ideal model for “high fashion” has to have a size that cannot go above certain very strict standards.
Bra size, hips … lots of restrictions that sometimes go against each single person natural shape, not considering extra kilos but just the body shape.
Newspapers are still filled by articles of girls killing themselves just because they do stop eating, or they eat and then they force themselves to throw out all of what they’ve just taken in … because they see themselves too fat, where on the contrary are just skeletons.
And it exists also the opposite situation: not being able to stop eating, so putting on so much weight, not even being able to have a normal life with all related also heart and circulation issues and critical health conditions.
But there are not just these extreme terrible cases, majority of eating disorders could be at different levels, not to risk life, but enough to ruin a good relationship with food, making it not a pleasure moment but a punishment in both ways when we decide not to eat or when we force ourselves to eat too much and even after having stopped the starving feeling.
Do we really want to be who we are not?
Can we all possibly become as thin as those magazine models?
Is this our reality?
Or the model is it the perfect blond with even lips that do not look natural, a Playboy doll style?
What is it beauty?
What are we looking for? Who is the model we dream to look like?
Are we happy of our life? Or are media just showing a perfection that is just a mask?
And is a perfect looking body the real key for success and happiness in life?
Or is it just a way to attract the wrong people who will look for us just for it, our body, and not for who we really are?
The only way to have a good relationship with our body is to be in peace with ourselves. Starting from accepting ourselves, who we are, and also our external look.
Of course we are called to take care of our body as well of our soul: mens sana in corpore sano is the Latin famous sentence: a healthy mind in healthy body.
But do we have to become paranoid about our body? Pushing everything over the limit? I am thinking also about all gym addicted people …
Too much is too much in everything.
Balance. To find a balance mainly within ourselves.
I want to remind you all that to look beautiful the best way is to wear a true smile. And where does it come from? From the within peace of mind.
How can we find it? Where do we get it from?
Nowhere. It has to start and come within ourselves: realizing that nobody is perfect, not even life, nor ourselves. So we have to accept what we cannot change, and even for what concerns changes we are not switches, everything needs its time, so we cannot pretend too much, we have to be patient and accept what we cannot change and work on what we can work on, and most of all start from loving ourselves, even with our past mistakes, with our limits …
And I am telling you this because I have learned it.
When I was younger at university I was free but lonely. Knowing lots of people but sometimes having the feeling of having no one really caring for me. Alone for the first time in another city for studying. Freedom. Nobody preparing the dinner for you, so no food “rules”.
I was working also as PR in the city university evening parties and discos. I wanted to be and look perfect: so I was going to the swimming pool, fasting, skipping dinner, arriving at the disco where I was supposed to spend all evening with public relation with other university students … I was smiling, speaking with everyone, checking that the evening was going fine, having my list at the entrance …
The apparently very nice life: I was able also to get free drinks, nothing to pay, just to enjoy myself talking with everyone and going around the place. Nothing special but what else may a university student want from the evenings outside? People, music, free drinks …
Well to tell you the truth, I was going back home and opening the fridge! Anything: I am not ashamed to say it now, because I hope it will help who at the moment is in the same situation I was at the time. Simply completely unhappy about myself and my life, just wanting to look perfectly beautiful and ok from outside, but inside actually “screaming” because I was not living a life I was really happy about.
And the food was the punishment because I was not able to be enough slim, because my size has never dropped below a certain level: I am like this, but I could not accept it having a different idea in my mind of what I wanted to look like, like someone who wasn’t me.
I think we only have to tend to be the best version of ourselves. Not copying anyone, not wanting to look like anyone else, just to be ourselves at our best. So of course fit, and healthy with no extra kilos as a weight, but without becoming crazy about perfection. It does not exist and it will not make ourselves happy anyway.
I think even media give us a wrong example. Women to be attractive have to wear heels and short skirts, and breast showing tops and so on …
Absolutely not! We are women because we are women, not due to what we wear.
And even the idea of being sexy. What is it? We do not have to attract sex, but we must follow and look for only true love.
So being loved for who we are, and not for what we look like. For our soul, not for our body.
Of course we do have a body as well, but we do not have to forget that it is not the most important part of ourselves.
Our soul must be beautiful.
And even sport has to be a pleasant activity to get fit and in harmony with our body, not like a medicine to push up muscles in perfect sculpted shape.
So today let’s start our own fashion looking at the our real self, as Christina Aguilera song “Beautiful”.
And let’s work to get the best out of ourselves, not with wrong models or ideas, but just with the love we always must have for ourselves, because first rule if we want to love someone else and we want to be loved, is to be able to love truly ourselves always everyday starting from the mirror morning first look.
So no more food punishments.
Food has to be a necessary good pleasure, with an healthy balance diet especially in quantities that makes the real difference.
Being in peace with ourselves is the first step for being in peace also with all the rest of the planet.
So let’s start now a new beginning with a new glance in the mirror, not to judge us and punish us, but to love us and take care of ourselves.
We all have to improve ourselves and grow but it can be done only with real true love, and this way will do everything for us and not against us, and it will be a pathway we will enjoy to follow, with maybe little results day by day, but definitely with a different purpose and awareness, a true beautiful shining peace of mind.
And I finish just reminding you that stress helps in most cases just to put on weight! And increases our food disorders. So deep breath, a couple more hugs with who really loves us and cares about us in our life, and let’s go!
Life is here waiting! It has just started, we are in!
Let’s live it the best, and always always always only OUR WAY! Life is one and is just ours! Do not waste ourselves. Let’s take care of ourselves from now on every single moment.
We are the changement. We can find only inside ourselves true happiness: it cannot come from outside.
Let’s love life, because life is beautiful.
Never to give up!
Thanks for reading me and see you next!